Bullshit Buzzwords

Schöner Artikel über Buzzwords say all the wrong things - Signal vs. Noise (by 37signals), mit Verweis auf den nicht minder wunderbaren Artikel Our industry is addicted to bullshit buzzwords, Zitat:

These days, high-tech companies don't release products, they provide solutions. And those products — er, solutions — don't just run a program or play a song. Instead, they enable experiences, optimize agility or even sometimes make people's passions come alive.

Und wenn man sich ein wenig im Internet umschaut, z.B. nach "enable empower adapt leverage" googelt, naja:

delivers unparalleled flexibility so that you can leverage existing technology, quickly adapt to new technology, easily connect with customers, partners, and suppliers, and rapidly adapt as market and business requirements change

Oder so:

... enables companies to succeed in today's economy ... and contributing to your bottom line ... get you started with a fully documented ... reusable prototype that you can turn into a productive solution quickly ... control costs, reduce risk, ... immediately experience the benefits of ... empower your company with ... a proven methodology that leverages a prototype approach to implementation ... proven preconfigurations of any size, for both new and existing customers ... easily adapt techniques ... meet your specific requirements ... put the power of ... in your hands.

Ja, ja, wunderbar, noch mehr:

...provides a suite of ... services that help manage and coordinate ... data and edge operations across a global operation ... creating a solid foundation for all use ... within enterprise-scale applications and business processes...

Fast schon rührend der nächste:

...solutions enabling our clients to make the right decisions at the right time using the right information ...

Aber den besten Bullshit kann doch SAP:

... Enterprise service-oriented architecture (enterprise SOA) is a blueprint for services-based, enterprise-scale business solutions that offer increased levels of adaptability, flexibility, and openness. With ... as its technical foundation, enterprise SOA moves IT architectures step-by-step to dramatically higher levels of adaptability -- and helps companies move closer to the vision of the real-time enterprise ... promise of enterprise SOA is twofold: facilitating business innovation while leveraging existing resources...

Ja! Das führt die "bullshit buzzwords" wahrhaftig zu "dramatically higher levels"! Immer noch nicht genug? Hier lässt sich übrigens Bullshit problemlos erzeugen: dack.com > web > web economy bullshit generator